Funerals and Celebrations of Life
Saying goodbye to a loved one is never easy, but I am here to guide you and your family every step of the way when it comes to creating a ceremony or service that reflects the unique life of those who have departed. Your funeral ceremony will also reflect the personality, and belief system or spirituality of your loved one, and I’m knowledgeable about a wide range of cultural practices and religious traditions.
For those who were agnostic or more secular in their views, I can also create a secular funeral or celebration of life, drawing from a number of literary works to evoke the right kind of farewell.
There are a variety of different ways to say goodbye. The following helpful breakdown of various types of funeral services was created by my colleagues at the Canadian Ministers Institute. These are all examples of the kinds of funeral services I offer:
Formal Funeral Service. The traditional funeral service that includes a body or ashes present. Family and friends gather to honour the life of the deceased in a structured ritualized event. This type of service is more often associated with a religious service, though not exclusively as it is also based on cultural practices.
Committal or Graveside Service. This may or may not be a part of a formal funeral service. Some people choose to only have a smaller/shorter service at the graveside moments before interment. There is usually a reading, prayer or a few words spoken before the body or ashes are buried. This service is ordinarily held at a cemetery.
Memorial Service. This service is commonly held at a later time, and after the body has been buried or cremated. People gather to remember the deceased, and this is a less formal type of service, though not necessarily an informal service. There is much more flexibility in terms of structure and flow of the service, which may or may not include any specific ritual.
Viewing or Visitation (also known as a Wake). This type of service is usually held before a formal funeral service, or before internment or cremation. The body is usually present, and this service is meant to allow family and friends to extend their condolences to the family of the deceased, as well as saying a final goodbye. Most of the time is spent with people interacting with each other in an informal way; however, there generally is a time for a formal gathering and a few words and or prayer may be spoken to the gathered community.
Scattering (of ashes) Ceremony. This ceremony is fitting when the family of the deceased decides not to keep the ashes after cremation. There is much flexibility in terms of the ceremony itself. The ceremony can be directed by the family completely, or they may choose to allow the minister full autonomy to officiate. This ceremony is similar to the graveside or committal service, with the difference that the ashes are not buried. The family chooses the way in which the ashes are scattered, into the air, a body of water, etc.
“Catherine has stood by our family from the happiest moments to the saddest. She unified us together on our wedding day, embedding the perfect quotes and just enough cork in our intimate wedding ceremony. She then stood by us when we welcomed our first baby into the world as we christened him with a naming ceremony. She spoke softly, with kind words of how we are to raise him and how his name was selected with meaning just for him. Catherine then recently stood by as we said goodbye to my mother-in-law from an unexpected tragedy. She spoke with elegance as she gave the eulogy of Patti's life and was the calming presence we needed as we said goodbye.
Catherine is a part of our deepest most intimate family moments and she fits so perfectly. She listens to you, acknowledges what your feelings and messages are, and then conveys the theme so beautifully during the ceremony. She is professional, and timely and gives you a smile just when you need it most. Catherine will continue to be a part of our celebration as we welcome our second child in the new year.”
- Cassy Carpino
Eulogy Writing and Delivery
Writing a eulogy is one of the most daunting tasks when preparing a funeral or celebration of life for a loved one. Finding the right words to encompass the story of someone you've lost can feel overwhelming, and most of us have little to no experience with such tasks. I offer guidance and coaching for eulogy writing either for individuals or for groups of colleagues, friends, or family members who would like to speak about a loved one's life at their service.
I can also take on eulogy writing, which involves interviewing close family and friends to gather your loved one's history and unique character. From there, it's up to you whether I deliver the eulogy at the service, or someone close to the departed assumes this role. Whatever your choice, my background in writing and editing help me support you in crafting a unique and personal eulogy.
Medical Assistance in Death and Living Wakes
Here in Ontario, many people are choosing to end their lives and their suffering under medical supervision. If you and your family would like to create a ceremony to honour this choice, I am available to help you realize your final wishes. Assisted death ceremonies can take place prior to or at the time of your final moments.
If you would like the unique ability to be able to attend your own celebration of life, consider coordinating a living wake. Celebratory in tone, this farewell gathering offers you the opportunity to hear your closest loved ones and colleagues memorialize you, and allows you to create exactly the tone you would like for your goodbye.
Grief Counselling
I offer additional support for my clients and families who are moving through loss. As a certified grief counsellor I use various therapeutic frameworks to help deal with the complex and often overwhelming emotions that come with loss. For clients who have an affinity for writing, my training as an expressive writing coach offers a unique way to process sadness, anxiety, depression, anger, guilt, and loneliness. Grief counselling is available at any stage of the process of laying a loved one to rest.
Get in touch
Please reach out to book a free consultation to discuss your needs. I offer funeral officiating in the Niagara Region, but will travel to surrounding areas for a modest travel fee. Please note that funeral services for children are always free of charge.
